Sunday, December 30, 2012

    The New Year is almost upon us! And that means a birthday celebration. This year is Bug's 12th birthday. We think she's having a skating party. Girl Drama! But usually her birthday means taking the tree down ahead of time so that Christmas is away and the focus is solely on her. But this year the holiday plans have been fraught with ...complications from both exes.
     DH and I got married at the end of the summer and even before that his ex has been--challenging! There is so much drama and escalation it drives me crazy. They take a small ember and pour gas on it. There is sooo much DISTRUST on both of their parts that when it comes to what's best for their child the vision gets clouded. What eats at me the most is the inability to stop and ask what is best for their child and then DO that. Because of the level of distrust the ex thinks I'm trying to be her mommy. She has a mommy and I'm NOT it. I KNOW that. I'm an extra adult in their child's life who is trying to help her grow into a great adult. She's 3-- so there is  a lot of growing yet to do. So on some level I understand where Miss Ex is coming from about the FB pictures but at the same time her father moved into my house and she spends every other weekend with us so pictures on FB is the show my friends the fun we have together. But that isn't going to happen anymore. I'm done with the silly BS from her and the accusations of things which aren't true. Overall it is her immaturity that thinks I am trying to replace her in her daughters life. As a mom, I would NEVER try to do that and even if I tried it would never happen. My goal is at some point for her to realize that she can't edit me out of her daughters life as long as I am married to her father. The serenity prayer reminds me that people need to learn the difference between the things they CAN change and things they can't.

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